Sunday, April 12, 2009

Face-Off

This is the time when life becomes challenging. When you have to look in the mirror and stare, not at the relfection, but reflecting upon the mirror. Who is this person looking at their self? Sometimes I believe it is not I who is looking into the mirror, but the world looking at me, me being the reflection. I have no special abilities, I am not the answwer to any question. I am just another person staring at the mirror trying to make out who he will become. Sometimes I can see myself doing great things, other times I see myself throwing it all away. Not a selfish toss of life, just a mere give up of importance. I find the most valuable things to be worthless. And little things become the biggest influence of my life. I would choose a kiss over wealth and love over health. Believe it or not I don't care about money. I don't want power becaause we all have it. Here we are in 2009, standing and living through years of chaos and war. That is power. Living is power. I don't want to be famous. To have my name plastered on walls or my picture in a google search engine. I would rather have the first page of a book to say Dedicated to my friend, Julian Cazares. That is being famous. To have friends who love you, and to respect you. I have that already. What I really want is to skip the decision of facing my self and go right into living my life. I want to wake up one morning and have my career and wife and that's all I really need. Everything previous to that day is a struggle. A struggle of choice. Who, what, when, where and why? At least I can say when I stare into the mirror, I am not afraid to say I don't know the answers to any of those questions.

However, I do know this. I have power, I have fame, and I am somebody. Time is the only thing preventing me from my stable living.

J.Cazares
CstarExpress

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