Sometimes my mind does it's own thing, thinks its own thoughts, plays its own games. I feel emotions I shouldn't feel. I grow traits that aren't supposed to be there. I collapse conclusions on top of one another and feel like there's a need to find the truth. I feel overpowered by my own control. I feel like there's more to the surface. I latch on to suspicion and find where it will lead me. I travel the landscape and search for clues. The more I gather the more it drives me past sanity. I close my eyes and wish it to go away and awaken to the same routine. It is a virus in my blood. A carrier of doubt. I have flooded my safety and I should take the blame.